It was a hot sunny day during the madness of the Covid epidemic and I paused to read the signs on the doors of the library. I had been going to the library to do my daily writing for the last couple years. I was curious what their rules and procedures were regarding disease prevention. I would like to start going back to the library to do some writing. It is far easier to be productive at the library than at home. One of the notes on the door mentioned that the library would have Wifi in the parking lot 24 hours a day. I thought for a second that I could work from my van in the parking lot if I needed a quiet place. My second thought was that wasn’t really a productive place to be. My third and final thought was “Am I too good to sit in the parking lot and write and hustle out there? Is a van with wifi just not good enough?
After reading these signs I continued my walk and pondered these thoughts. I had seemingly tripped over my own sense of entitlement. Was a focused, comfortable, quiet workplace something I was entitled to? In the end I came to feel as though these things are luxuries. What I really needed was the most modest of workplaces; my computer, some internet, and a place to sit was about all I needed. A van in the library would provide all these things. If that is where I must write to be productive, then that is where I will write.
I have not taken advantage of the library parking lot Wifi yet. Since reading the sign I have had a lot else going in life, so its not come up. The parking lot is in my mind as a backup location for my writing practice. If I am to find success, acting like I am above doing work in such places is a trap. So many times we hears the stories of entrepreneurs or creative folks talking about phases of their lives where they worked in weird places. A lot of great works started in dingy basements and garages. Success finds a way. It is easy to hear those stories and think that is not how I will find my success. I sit and think that things will be comfortable for me, they may not be.
It is worth pondering where else in my life am I acting entitled. Entitlement can live in so many areas, and it never serves the host well. Forging the proper attitude about all sorts of things is so important. Things like entitlement can be sneaky, but we can catch them.
I am glad I caught this mindset of comfort and entitlement. It has no purpose living inside me. If the things I am working on truly matter, then comfort and entitlement will not. That is what I learned that day while thinking and pondering life on that long walk. So sooner or later, I may be in a parking lot in a van writing and avoiding the distractions of home. If I don’t end up there, it won’t be because I think I am too good to sit in a van in the parking lot getting after it.