Thoughts on obsessions and balance…
So I have managed to take my enthusiasm for lifting weights and turn it into a product. I am now working to turn that app and product into an actual business. As a result I spend 90% of my waking time thinking in some way about lifting weights.
I am spending a large amount of time either lifting weights, writing code to make a weightlifting app, or learning more about lifting weights. Most of the time this is pretty cool.
I have moments of feeling unbalanced. I do have some contract work I am doing, so that is an escape from the world of lifting weights. I watch some tv too. These things help. But other than that, pretty much everything is about lifting weights.
My entire life revolves around the concept of lifting progressively heavier objects. The question I constantly ask myself is “How does this thing I am doing help me or others bench press 400 pounds?” Passion has moved into obsession.
I can live with being obsessed. In general I am very happy with working on these things. I do see how this obsession can turn sour fast if I’m not careful.
The other night I started to write out a 4 year powerlifting training cycle do see where I might be able to take my lifting. I’m not sure what that says about my mindset, but it happened. It is getting harder for me to focus and talk about anything other than lifting or building this business up. I have no true hobbies at the moment, I workout, and I work.
More worrisome than all the super focus weirdness is that fact that I am starting to suffer real life performance issues. I am progressively getting more tired. My code and writing is more sloppy and not wanting to flow at all. In the gym I am having to put in a lot more effort and energy into hitting big weights. I feel like I am stuck in an infinite loop here. I think this narrow focus and obsession has got to be a contributing factor to my performance issues. Obsession has taken hold, luckily I am seeing that, because that means I can attempt to manage it.
This whole path has turned my outlets and hobbies and turned them into work, or something work related. I got nothing else. I wouldn’t really advise this path to anyone else. If you’re going to turn hobbies or passions into a business, you got to have something else going on long term. Short term obsession probably can work. Making your life all about one thing though, well that wakes up the crazy.
Being so single minded is just not good, and I have been learning that the last few weeks. I suspect in the coming days I need to try and branch out and experience a bit more of life and not be so obsessed. I’ll figure something out, things are in motion. My best advice is that this obsession can sneak up on you fast. Part of pushing yourself seems to be that you got to make sure you don’t push yourself off the cliff.